Until Then
by holeygeorge
Summary: Chibiusa has left to the future but not Usagi's heart. A bittersweet revelation ensues.


She was crazy. Absolutely, positively, nut-house crazy. What else could explain this?

Here she sat on this bench for the third time this week. Like one of those weirdo people you heard about on late-night talk shows.

It was just that she was sitting there more often than she used to. It was the fact that it was at the park. It was the fact that it was around families. It was the fact that she loved to watch them.

She hadn't talked to the others about this habit that was becoming a problem. How could she explain what she was feeling when she could hardly understand it herself?

Ever since Chibusa had left back to the future, Usagi had begun visiting the park. The first time she had plopped down on this bench right by the jungle gym and loving mothers and fathers, Usagi had not really thought about why she was there. She had been on her way to Rei's when she took the detour to the park. The birds had been singing, the sun shining, and so the number of families had been large. She found them interesting.

Of course, her first thought was of Mamo-chan. How the idea of starting their own family was appealing. They were nowhere near ready, financially, emotionally, or in any way really ready. But the thought was there.

So as she stared at the children running to their parents either to share a new discovery or in tears to share a new scrape or bruise, she thought of the future. Soon enough she left the park, mostly because it began to empty out as the sun lowered from its perch in the sky.

But the next day Usagi had found herself back in the spot. Back on the bench, watching little girls in bows and cute clothes hold hands with their mothers.

And today was no different. Except today her eyes were moist. Her fingers knotted upon her lap and her heart heavy.

"There you are, Usako," came a deep voice. Usagi looked up and offered Mamo-chan a smile. He took the seat next to her, draping an arm around her shoulders.

Mamoru could tell something was wrong. Usagi lacked her usual cheeriness. So he cut to the chase.

He kissed her head, but did not move away, "What's wrong?" he spoke into her hair.

She sighed wistfully, "I miss her." He did not need to ask. He knew how she felt. So he just nodded, kissed her head once more and then looked out at the scenery before them.

Finally he spoke, softly, "We'll meet her again someday. And then we can spend all the time we want with her. Love her and spoil her."

"I know, Mamo-chan. But it's just, I feel like…she was taken too soon, which is selfish I know! But I barely had any time with Chibusa: _my daughter._ I had known her only as Chibiusa: _the brat._ Some kid from some other time who reminded me a little too much of myself and who I for some reason loved very much. I had treated her as a sister, a friend. I want to love her as a mother. Which is stupid because I'm way too young and…and immature to possibly…" she sighed again and leaned her head against his chest and hugged him as best she could with how they were sitting.

He rubbed her shoulder, then spoke reassuringly, "When she was here, you offered her what she needed. She was scared. You helped her forget that she was in a strange place and that her mother was in trouble. She needed a sister, a friend."

Usagi quickly turned to face him, looking pained, "Oh, but I miss her! I don't know how to explain it…I feel like there's this space in my heart. Someone's turned on this switch that wasn't supposed to be on yet: the 'mom switch.' And they left the room without turning it off. Like I said, I know we're not ready to have a kid yet. But that doesn't mean I don't miss her smile, or her smart mouth." She looked down toward her hands and though she smiled, her eyes watered.

"I know," was all Mamoru could say was his throat grew tight, "I know", he repeated.

And there they sat until the families began to clear out for lunch.

Usagi finally spoke up, "But you're right Mamoru. We'll meet her again one day." She smiled, a real Usagi-smile.

She stood, raising a fist to the air and spoke passionately, "And until then we will work hard to become amazing parents!" Mamoru couldn't help the blush the graced his cheeks as his mind wandered the way men's minds generally do.

She looked over to him and turned pink herself as she caught on. He stood and enveloped her within his arms.

He leaned down to kiss her.

_GRUMBLE_

Usagi reddened considerably.

He laughed, "How about some lunch first?"

He kissed her nose before taking her hand to guide her to the nearest restaurant.

_Fin_


End file.
